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SHE WAS BORN TO SUFFER…………AND THE SUFFERING CONTINUE

I AM NOT A WRITER, BUT I CAN’T TURN DEAF EARS TO THE STORIES THAT HAPPEN TO CROSS ACROSS MY EARS AND THIS STORY THAT I AM GOING TO SHARE IS A STORY THAT HAD TO BE BORN SOMEDAYS. CERTAINLY,LIFE ISN’T A BED OF ROSES, BUT THERE ARE PEOPLE WHOSE LIVING PERHAPS HAS NEVER SEEN A LEAFLET OF ROSE.SO, LET ME SHARE WHAT LIFE BRINGS UP IN THE FATE OF A 31 YEARS OLD FEMALE OF NEPAL.

BORN IN THE PLAIN OF THE TERAI REGION OF NEPAL IN THE LOW-MIDDLE CLASS FAMILY, SHE WAS THE THIRD CHILD AMONG HER 8 SIBLINGS. UNLIKE HER PARENTS WHO DIDN’T HAPPEN TO KNOW HOW SCHOOLING AND EDUCATION WAS, SHE WAS VERY LUCKY TO ATTEND A SCHOOL UNTIL GRADE 8. BUT THEN, SHE WAS A GIRL, AND IN THE PLAINS OF NEPAL, IT WAS HER AGE OF MARRIAGE, AS SHE HAD TURNED 16 ALREADY. NEPAL IS KNOWN FOR CHILDHOOD MARRIAGE AND SO IS IT FAMOUS FOR ARRANGED MARRIAGE. LIKEWISE, SHE HAD A PROPOSAL OF MARRIAGE WITH A BOY OF AGE 18 WHO HAD ALMOST THE SAME LEVEL OF EDUCATION AS SHE HAD.THIS BOY WITH WHOM SHE HAD TO SPEND ALL HER LIFE, WAS A TAXI DRIVER WHO HAPPENED TO LIKE HER AND THEIR PARENTS FIXED MARRIAGE OF BOTH OF THEM. ‘WAS SHE HAPPY, WHAT WERE HER WISHES, WAS SHE PREPARED? “ ALL THESE QUESTIONS STILL HAUNT HER AS SHE HADN’T SEEN THE GUY BEFORE MARRIAGE.YES MARRIAGE LIKE THAT STILL HAPPENS IN NEPAL. BUT SHE NEVER KNE W IT WOULD MAKE HER SUFFER LIKE SHE HAD SUFFERED IN HER CHILDHOOD DAYS.

HER CHILDHOOD DAYS…SHE WAS PAMPERED WHEN SHE WAS VERY YOUNG. SHE WAS DADDY’S FAVOURITE. BUT WITH AGE, AND WITH INCREASING POVERTY, AND WITH THE BIRTH OF NEW FAMILY MEMBERS, THINGS STARTED TAKING A TWIST. DASHAIN,THE BIGGEST FESTIVAL OF NEPAL, IT WAS THOSE FESTIVALS WHERE SHE HAD THE CHANCE OF KNOWING WHAT MEAT WAS. IT WAS THOSE ALTERNATE YEARS, WHEN SHE WOULD BE GIFTED A NEW PAIR OF SCHOOL DRESS,FOR THERE WAS NO MONEY TO BUY OTHER CLOTHES AND THIS WOULD SERVE DUAL PURPOSE, A NEW CLOTH AND SCHOOL UNIFORM. RARELY VISITED OUT OF THE PLACE, SHE DIDN’T KNOW WHAT OUTER WORLD WAS. MISTAKES OF BEING AWAY FROM HOME TO MARKET, AND HAVING BUFFALO MEAT ( HER FRIEND USED TO GIVE IT FOR FREE) MEANT SHOWERS OF STICKS FROM HER DADDY. MAY BE SHE HAD DREAMS LIKE THOSE OF OTHER CHILDREN, TO PLAY WITH DOLLS, TO ROAM WITH FRIENDS TO NEW PLACES, TO EAT GOOD FOODS, TO HAVE NEW DRESSES, TO STUDY NEW BOOKS, TO BATH WITH SHAMPOOS INSTEAD OF CLAYS,TO WATCH TELEVISION… BUT SHE HAD NO AIMS IN LIFE. OR IS IT, WHEN SHE HAD TIME FOR VISION ,SHE WAS TO BE MARRIED WITH UNKNOWN GUY.
BUT SHE HAS A VISION NOW…..
TO TURN THIS LIFE OF HELL INTO SOMETHING WORTH LIVING.

SHE IS NOW MARRIED FOR 15 YEARS. SHE HAS A DAUGHTER AGED 14 AND A SON AGED 12. HER DAUGHTER STUDIES IN GRADE 6 AND HER DAUGHTER IN GRADE 7. DURING HER INITIAL DAYS OF MARRIAGE, SHE HAD BETTER LIFE, A GOOD LOVING HUSBAND AND A GOOD FAMILY. BUT THINGS STARTED FALLING APART WHEN HER HUSBAND STARTED DRINKING. THEY STARTED TO BE BANKRUPT AND HER INLAWS DISOWNED THEM. WITH THOSE TODDLERS IN LAP, SHE HAD TO LOOK FOR JOBS IN THE STREETS OF KATMANDU IN ORDER TO FEED THEM. STARTED FROM SELLING CORN IN THE STREETS TO BITTEN RICE IN ROADS, SHE CURRENTLY HAS A VERY SMALL GROCERY. HER HUSBAND TORMENTS HER DAILY IN THE INFLUENCE OF ALCOHOL, FROM VERBAL ABUSE TO PHYSICAL ASSAULT. SHE HAS NOONE TO CALL GTO HELP FOR IN THE MIDDLE OF NIGHT. THE HOUSE OWNER WHERE THEY LIVE IN RENT COMES TO REQUE OFTEN. FROM BROKEN LIMBS TO MULTIPLE BRUISES, HER ARRANGED MARRIAGE HAS TURNED INTO A CURSE. ALL THE BURDEN OF FAMILY, FROM SCHOOL FEES TO FEEDING OF WHOLE FAMILY, SHE IS THE ONE TO LOOK FOR. SHE HAS NEUROPATHIC PAIN IN HER RIGHT LEG, AND HAD SUFFERED FROM CONVERSION DISORDER (MENTAL DISEASE). CURRENTLY SHE IS LIVING IN RENTED HOUSE AND POSSESS NOTHING AS PROPERTY EXCEPT FOR THOSE CHILDREN. SHE DREAMS TO EDUCATE THEM, BUT IT HAS BEEN YEARS OF CHANGING SCHOOL DUE TO INABILITY TO PAY SCHOOL FEE. SHE THINKS SHE MAY HAVE TO DROP THEM OFF SCHOOL COMING YEAR, AS SHE ALREADY HAS LOANS DUE TO DIFFICULTIES IN FEEDING FAMILY. BUT SHE WISHES HER CHILDREN BE EDUCATED AND HEAL HER CHRONIC WOUND.
AS SHE SAYS HER STORIES OF LIFE, MY EYES WELL UP. THERE ARE MANY BITS OF HER STORY.MANY MORE EVENTS…MANY MORE SUFFERINGS. THIS SEEMS TO BE LITTLE PAINFUL BUT TO LIVE A LIFE WORTH A HELL IS A REAL PAIN. I WISH HER CHILDREN STUDY, I WISH HER SUFFERINGS DIMINISH, ANDIF POSSIBLE GO AWAY.
BUT NOT ALL WISHES ARE GRANTED.

 

HER SUFFERINGS STILL CONTINUE……MORE EVERYDAY….

DR YAGYA PD TIMALSINA
(TIMALSINAYAGYA@GMAIL.COM)
KATHMANDU, NEPAL

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Nepal

greater-nepal-map-to-prince-harry-by-1

 

Let me turn to history
The things of mystery.
A country, named Nepal, was founded
With the continuous struggle that surrounded
Had Prithvi Narayan Shah not united
We would have lost our identity.
Of course, it would have raped our dignity.

Since 18th to 21st century,
Though had we progressed in some advisories
Were we there in Sikkim, and Tista
Here we are in Mechi to Mahakali.

New Nepal was formed in 11th Baishak with 19 days of struggle
And lost many warriors to overthrow the Kingship
All had bright hopes of success and prosperity
All were promised to dedication and sincerity.
But, all these turned out to be fake and dirty.

Now I have come to the present
Where Nepal has become a stinking scent.
NEPAL;
A country in dark, where only lectures spark
A country in fight , where people have no fundamental right.
A country as beggar, begging selfishly with every country ever and ever
A country as a unguided ship, lost all its good qualities as hospitality and friendship,
All these things have become our unique identities.

Finally,
I don’t have any comments
Nor do I pose any compliments
Only I dare for a suggestion,
Try to remove all these humiliating identities out of nation.

Yagya Prasad Timalsina
Grade:Ten

 

P.S. an article i found when i sneaked back to my email written 7 years back!!!!!  a collection worth publishing!!

a memoir to my article !!

Buddha’s life

YOU DON’T GET BURNT ALONG WITH YOUR FERRARI IN YOUR FUNERAL.SO,DONATE!

20151009_14320520151011_123415IMG_20150502_14533420151009_13565920150714_14494720151009_135659IMG_20150501_09015920150714_153747IMG_20150503_150004IMG_20150503_144908IMG_20150501_131907IMG_20150502_151001IMG_20150503_101038IMG_20150503_16011320151021_185827IMG_20150502_141712IMG_20150502_151653Ever felt like helping those who need it right away? Yes, many of us feel like helping people at need. But, how many of us move forward and help by knocking off the inner dilemma of mind. This avoidable dilemma consists from shyness to move forward, thoughts which consists of what others think, or what the needy might think ,the confusions of, if my help really matters and many other feelings that swells up due to chemical changes in our body. I term this as ‘fear’ response because, you have not been offering help frequently, an insecurity to the normal pattern of your life events and a deviation from this normal rhythm would make your body to find this situation as an awkward moment.
Then, what does it take to step forward and help as much as you can ?
A simple realization of UNIVERSAL TRUTH. The only truth with which we are born. The truth of DEATH. Your fear, your insecurities and everything else falls off when you realize that you are only a few kilograms of dust in this universe. All that matters is your effort to make this world better before you turn into ashes. All it takes is this intuition within us and keep moving to make this place a better place.
This universal truth makes me step everyday and act kicking off this fear response. The incidence of Earthquake of 7.8R on April,2015 killing tens of thousands, the black year, also did boost my morale to help people. Had I been dead in that instance(though was a near one), I wouldn’t have been able to write this off or help hundreds of people in the ways I could all these months after April,2015. It takes courage to lead and take challenges to fulfill your goal. With the help of kind hearted people around, I could personally make a difference in those shattered houses and broken hearts, providing financial helps, medical help and psychological support integrating all my lessons I had gone through all these 21 years of my life.
I have been helped in this effort by many and the most notable would be the kind soul who voluntarily assisted my effort in child psychological program after the trauma set up by earthquake by providing financial and material help. The child project was done almost in 7 phases, along with efforts from my friends of Kathmandu Medical College and Teaching Hospital. You should always make your best effort so that the help you provide is accessible only to those in needs. Else , it simply is a fraud. Hence, take no chances to make the best survey you can to find the needy, like I personally conducted surveys in those rumbled villages in Earthquake 2015.
BUT , this is not the end to the troubles nature forced us Nepalese to suffer with. This winter has been very harsh. With millions below poverty line and lost homes, many have shivered to deaths recently and many are in verge to lose their life due to lack of materials to ward off cold. To add the misery, the political instability causing economic blockade to Nepal and the incompetence of Nepalese government to provide relief materials to the victims, have forced many innocent helpless families to suffer every single day with cold. But we are still surviving. We are with hopes. The almighty power has blessed us and we are capable to help those in need.
So, isn’t it time to help all those good hearts who have been helping to provide food, clothes or shelter to the helpless victims of Earthquake? Yes, it’s high time we do it. And as my favorite author, Robin Sharma, says, “lead without title” let us lead to make this world a warm world by donating all we can for those who are less blessed than we are. Let us make every small effort to help. Every single penny counts , every single clothes counts and every single feelings to help and courage to act counts.
NORMA LAYTON, who has a pure kind spirit and knows that she won’t be carrying anything to her deathbed has been helping Nepalese Children in supplying school supplies. She has made it on her personal efforts to much but supports from friends was appreciable. She is currently heading to collect funds for clothing for Earthquake victims and help Nepalese be warm. I am much happier to help her in her efforts and would do so in every possible way to make a positive difference in the lives I would touch in days to come. I am not a member to any social organizations, though was asked by a couple and promised good position, after my works in Earthquake. What I always believed is that, you don’t need a title to be a leader. Work the best from the position and place you are and embrace the perfect bliss you feel when you do what your heart has always wanted to do.

Make this your time. Make small efforts every single day. Help to heal every single would that appears to your sight. There is always something you can do. Hence kick off that fear response and join in the efforts of those who lead to help others. Don’t hesitate. You won’t take your car/bank-balance/bungalow with you in your deathbed. You will only take the graces and blessings you embraced during your survival. Your only wealth is the difference you made in the positive sense when you were breathing, the good vibes that you sent and the good works you did selflessly.

So, make a difference in the lives of earthquake victims and support NORMA LAYTON by donating in this link :IMG_20150502_15054720151009_131608

https://www.gofundme.com/booksfornepal

India’s illegal blockade to Nepal is as violent as Paris attack, killing millions of Nepali silently#ParisAttacks With #parisattacks this message can help world know abt Nepal’s condition. Share it in your twitter ids and facebook id. So, world knows abt it. This can be a good platform to let world act against India’s blockade.

Take a look at @TimalsinaNaresh’s Tweet: https://twitter.com/TimalsinaNaresh/status/665537168660520960?s=09

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An open letter to World’s Medias, World’s Organizations and Concerned Authorities

Date : Oct 5,2015

An open letter to World’s Medias, World’s Organizations and Concerned Authorities

Respected Madam/Sir,
I am a dignified Nepali residing in the lap of Himalayas embracing multiple cultures and traditions. This land of Mt. Everest and The land of Buddha, the gem of Asia, is an independent sovereign nation with an area of 147,181 square kilometers and almost 30 million residents. I represent the unified voices of millions of Nepalese in this letter and want world to know about Nepal’s current situation.

Nepal got its first democratic constitution on Sept. 20, 2015, which was drafted by the representatives of over 90 percentage of people residing in Nepal. It is the moment of joy for all the Nepalese. But our so-called good neighbor was unhappy to see us proceed towards development and imposed a threat to Nepal’s constitution by imposing a blockade. India, the so-called largest democratic nation, played its foul game in order to halt the promulgation of constitution in Nepal, sending off its special representatives days before and days after implementation of constitution In Nepal. Nepalese couldn’t afford to wait longer to implement the new constitution as it was demanded for almost 70 years, the new laws of the general Nepalese people. The blockade is still going on. Nepal buys its major supplies including fuels, clothes, medicines, foods etc from India.
The blockade, which India had denied earlier was proved by Indian Ministry of External Affairs (MEA) ,which instructed its agencies to lift the unofficial blockade against Nepal, on Oct 3,2015. But the blockage is still continued until today, Oct. 5, 2015. The Indian Oil Corporation has fooled Nepalese Oil Corporation as it hasn’t allowed our trunks to load the fuels which is an essentials at this moment. This so-called blockade removal by India is taken as a step to restrict Nepal to stop treaties with China as China transit route was made accessible on Oct. 2, 2015. India mustn’t forget that Nepal is only using trade route of India and Nepal buys the fuels which is at peak of the crisis, compelling students to restrict going to schools, ambulances, publics to offices and so on.

The Madhesi leaders(the representative of Terai residents), who are in protest regarding Nepal’s constitution have put forward a strike in no man’s land halting supplies In Nepal. They are in Indian part of land and taking shelters in India troubling millions of sick people to get medicines, publics to fuels and traders to business. Let world know that Nepal has an Open border with India and this protest is going on places bordering India which depicts the notions of these parties. Many Indians join the protest and trouble Nepalese, as per the locals residing in those places. 40 are killed during this protest, and 8 police officials and a small child were the first to be killed brutally by the protesters. The violence has started and reached to the peak once the Madhesi leaders declared a revenue of Rs. 5,000,000 to the deceased, the national hero recognizations and many others facilities if Mades(terai) is made separate state. They haven’t been given a penny, according to a family of a deceased. There has been a wrong statements being spread by the leaders to the uneducated people of Terai stating that they aren’t given rights in the new constitution which is totally a fake news. in fact, the present President, the vice presidents, the prime minister and many are a resident of Terai. The residents of Nepal doesn’t want Terai to be separated from Nepal as Nepal is posed a threat of losing lands like that Of Sikkim, Darjeeling’s and many other border encroachments area.

Nepal is a landlocked country, bodering to China to North and India to the remaining. A landlocked country has special rights of usage of sea transit for import of supplies using a third nation. If this right is prohibited by any third country, that nation must be liable for penalties. Well, India seems to be the master of games, and didn’t put an official tag of blockade. But, even a kid can understand the desire of India to intercept in Nepal’s constitution by imposing a threat of Blockade. We, Nepalese have protested every single day against India’s unnecessary imposition of Blockade and interference. #BackOffIndia was the trend that is on rise after India’s dirty play. We have had a good relation to India but if this sort of behavior continues in Nepal, the land of Gurkhas, might have to forget the harmony and ask the government of Nepal to seal the borders and introduce Visa system to India. India shouldn’t forget that Nepal is the only neighbor which has good relation with it, and surely knows about Pakistan and other nations.

United Nations Organization, European Union, Foreign Embassies, World Medias, and concerned authorities are requested to play a vital role without intruding Nepal’s sovereignty and internal affairs. No matter how small our nation is in the world map, our history, sovereignty and pride is no less to any other independent nation. We urge international medias to play a vital role in Nepal in this stage and focus the news about our blockade in World every moment until India removes blockade and assures no further interceptions in our internal issues. We ask for our rights in international organization about the transit and urge international law forum to investigate this issue and present India before World court. We don’t want India’s interference or any other nations interference in our internal issues. Few are said and many are left to be told. Once, world gets knowledge about dominance of India illegally in Nepal, we will speak more with you all. Please send your international reporters here in Nepal (except from Indian nations, as we could smell the biasness in few international news) and ask government of India about WTO treaty of landlocked countries.

Better seen than heard, come here international world and let justice be spoken! We, The Nepalese, known for our hospitality, love and peace would want world to come here and be a verdict for truth. A voice that speaks of millions of voices about Nepal!!! A humble request from Nepal!!
Thanking you!

#Nepalesestandtogether
#BackOffIndia
#WTOtreaty
A responsible Nepali

Opportunity in disguise

        doctors-coat

         April 25, 2015 at 11:56 am: For centuries to go, this day will be remembered as the “Black Day” in the history of Nepal. The unseen able and probably unforgiveable movement of Indian and Tibetan plates beneath the earth caused Nepal’s land to be shaken with terrors. With Gorkha as epicenter on April 25, 2015; measuring 7.8 on Richter Scale, followed by three major aftershocks measuring 6.6R on April 25,2015 (Gorkha), 6.9R on April 26,2015 (Sindhupalchowk) and 6.8R on May 12,2015 (Dolakha/Sindhupalchowk) and thousands of aftershocks, killed over 8850 innocent people. This cruelty of nature injured over 22,000 people with almost 900,000 houses destroyed rendering millions homeless and foodless. Spare the financial loss which is insurmountable.

On the very first day of this tragedy, I myself had a narrow escape from death. It was just a matter of seconds when the water tank from my 3 storied building fell just behind me. Horrified and motionless, it was my brother who took me to a safe open area. It was during the evening that I realized the gravity of the situation raising when I heard the news of deaths and injuries following earthquake that day.
Perhaps, it was the feeling for humanity and a pang of responsibility that led me to the nearest hospital from my home the next morning. Bhaktapur Hospital was in a total chaos with over-crowding of the injured and relatives of the deceased. With limited doctors and health professionals , any person related to medical profession was considered a boon. As soon as I presented my medical identity card, I was requested by the attending emergency doctor to assist him as a volunteer. From recording vitals to opening of intravenous line, I was given the duties of a doctor. Learning by observing what the seniors did was the only option left for me.
We were all busy with our works when another aftershock followed measuring 6.9R that day. We managed to treat patients in the ground in front of the emergency hall. Though I made minor mistake s during various medical procedures, I could alleviate the sufferings of many patients. I got an opportunity to learn many emergency procedures during the next three days under the guidance of seniors .Honestly speaking, it was emotionally challenging to me during the very first approach to the injured as I was never exposed to such real scenarios. How badly did I wish that my college prepare us for such disasters since the very first years of medical life! I could have been more efficient had I received any such trainings earlier.
On subsequent days, I managed to be a part of a mobile medical team led by US doctors where I visited Changunarayan and Pikhel of Bhaktapur. I acted as a translator and also recorded vitals in the camp. Wound infections following traumatic accidents, Respiratory tract infections and water borne illnesses were noted as their major concerns. Community participations from making tents to arrangements of queues led us to run our camp efficiently. Ah, those ecstatic moments when people blessed us for our efforts!
Hunger prevailed in those areas where we had our camp. Hence, departing the medical teams to Sindhupalchowk, I stayed back in Bhaktapur where I gathered the local youths to raise funds. Almost Nrs.30,000 was collected and relief materials were distributed effectively after a preliminary survey of necessity. With distribution of relief materials, I gave a demonstration of scientific hand washing methods among villagers along with the methods of water purification and importance of sanitation. It boosted up my confidence and mass communication skill.
Lastly, I was involved in a child project launched by AIESEC. It involved children in arts, crafts, games, singing, dancing etc to help them cope the terrors of earthquake with play therapy, teach them the basic earthquake drill and counsel their parents about boosting the children with positive vibes despite tremors of earthquake. Among all, it gave me a perception that children are the most vulnerable group for post traumatic stress disorders.
As a medical student, it was and is always my foremost duty to help the patients and serve them. This duty increases several folds during such calamities. I stretched myself to utmost limit and got once in life experience. It was ,in fact ,an opportunity for me to learn many new things, though this opportunity was created by this ironic incident. As our country lacks sufficient number of fully licensed physicians, every medical students should walk out of their comfort zones and help in what-so-ever stuffs they are compatible with. These disasters demands a unified and responsible move amongst all. It is always drops of water that makes an ocean. No small help is small. Hence, being in the highest regard of profession, it becomes our foremost responsibility to help people in whatever way we can, in whatever circumstances we are blessed with.

Yagya Pd. Timalsina
MBBS III
Kathmandu Medical College and Teaching Hospital